Renaissance Cook Challenge: A Three-Course Meal Inspired by Three Dynamite Ladies

Last night I completed my own entry for the Renaissance Cook Challenge. I had originally planned to base each course of the meal on a cherished piece from my own wardrobe, but then thought hey, why not spread a little love and plug some dynamite style bloggers instead?

The appetizer course was based on this post by Jessica Schroeder of What I Wore. Jessica's style appeals to me because, well... she IS me. She's in her mid-twenties (check), loves vintage clothing (check), believes that personal style should not be wholly governed by trends (check- check), and believes that one need not be uber-wealthy to be uber-classy (check-check-double-check). She suggested I invent "something spicy" based on the outfit pictured. I was happy to oblige, as it's one of my favorite combos of hers.

Roasted Tomato Salsa

Inspired by Jessica Schroeder

Ingredients

1 large tomato, cut in half

2 thick slices of onion

Salt, black pepper, and dried cayenne pepper to taste

1 head garlic

2 Tbsp. olive oil

Juice of 1/2 a lime

1/2 c. cilantro leaves

Splash sherry vinegar

Directions

Heat the oven to 425.

Season the tomato halves and onion slices with salt, pepper, and cayenne. Peel the outer layer of skin from the garlic, leaving the cloves attached to the head. Arrange the tomato, onion, and garlic in a roasting pan and drizzle the olive oil over. Roast 30 minutes.

Remove pan from oven and allow to cool. Transfer the tomato and onion to a food processor or paddle blender. Add the pulp from the garlic cloves, discarding the skin. Add the lime juice, cilantro, and vinegar.

Pulse on medium speed about 3-5 times, or until the salsa has reached its desired chunkiness. Scrape the salsa into a container with a lid, seal tightly, and chill. I made mine a day in advance so that the flavors would have plenty of time to get to know one another, but a couple hours' chilling time would suffice. Serves 6-8 as an appetizer.

My entree took its color cues from this "costume of the day" posted by Kelly Framel, aka The Glamourai. When she's not working her day job as a stylist, Kelly breathes new life into vintage jewelry, which you can find for sale at Shrimpton Couture and The Glamporium. She did not have any special requests as far as what dish I made in honor of her, so I picked an outfit I loved and carried on with the Southwest-ish culinary theme.

Pork Loin Spirals With Corn and Black Beans

Inspired by Kelly Framel

Ingredients

1 c. black beans, cooked

1 c. corn, fresh shucked or thawed frozen

1/4 c. olive oil, plus extra to baste

2 Tbsp. sherry vinegar, plus extra to de-glaze

1 Tbsp. cumin

1 tsp. dijon mustard

1/4 tsp. salt, plus extra to season the meat

1/4 tsp. pepper, plus extra to season the meat

6 large garlic cloves, minced

Zest of 2 lemons, grated or minced

Juice of 1/2 lemon

4 inches fresh ginger, grated

2 pork tenderloin fillets, weighing about 1 1/4 lbs each

1/2 c. Manchego cheese, diced small

Directions

Mix all ingredients except the pork loin and Manchego in a container with a lid. Store in the fridge to marinate for 8-48 hours, stirring periodically.

Around the same time you assemble the filling, cut into each pork loin lengthwise. Stop at least 1/4" short of cutting it in half. Make another incision from the center moving outward. Again, do not cut all the way through. Unfold. Each loin should now be about 4 times its original width.

Spread the meat on a hearty surface that can take a good pounding. Cover it in plastic wrap and bang it with a mallet until it's good and flat. Season with salt and pepper. Store in the fridge until ready to cook.

Heat the oven to 400.

Saute the marinated filling over medium heat until the garlic grows soft and flavors the other components. Deglaze with additional sherry vinegar if necessary. This will take about 5-7 minutes, but if you were a chickenless cook, you would taste as you go ;)

Spread the pork flat in an oiled baking pan. Allow the filling to cool a few minutes, then divide it evenly between the two fillets and spread it over, leaving a border of 3/4" to 1". Sprinkle on the cheese. Roll the loins up lengthwise and secure with 6 or more pieces of kitchen twine each. Baste each loin with a bit of olive oil. Roast about 1 hour. Remove the twine and cut into rounds from top to bottom. Serves 6-8.

Dessert was inspired by this frock posted by Fleur de Guerre of Diary of a Vintage Girl. She, like Kelly, gave me free reign to choose from her oodles of fabulous photos. I imagine this one wouldn't have been her first pick; she's a self-described "part-time pinup girl and full-time Forties enthusiast," and this look is more 50s. But I'm sure she'll approve of the azure after-dinner cocktails I served in her honor.

Blue Hawaiian Pina Coladas

Inspired by Fleur de Guerre

Ingredients (Alcoholic Version)

4 oz. rum

2 oz. blue curacao

6 oz. unsweetened coconut milk

1 c. fresh pineapple chunks

1 1/2 Tbsp. sugar or simple syrup

10 ice cubes

Ingredients (Kid-Friendly Version)

6 oz. whole milk

6 oz. unsweetened coconut milk

1 c. fresh pineapple chunks

2 Tbsp. sugar or simple syrup

A few drops blue food coloring

10 ice cubes

Directions

Place all ingredients in a blender and run on high until smooth. Serves 4 (or 2 double-tall as pictured).

Thanks to everyone who participated in this challenge! If you haven't participated yet and you live on my side of the globe, it's not too late. Your time isn't up until the day is over...

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Cake Enthusiast Dave Spencer Takes the Renaissance Cook Challenge

If you have been reading along with me for awhile, you may remember Dave Spencer as one of my Chickenless Cooks of the Week (a feature I have since discontinued, as it seemed to spotlight fantastic accomplishments without inspiring the "real" people who read my blog). Dave has stepped up to my Renaissance Cook Challenge by posting this hilarious podcast, starring his adorable family of superheroes! I could not be more tickled.

Remember, the deadline for this challenge is Tuesday the 26th- less than a week away. So what's YOUR other hobby? Remember to leave a comment or write dontbeawuss@gmail.com so I don't accidentally miss your post.

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Sweet Lentils Three Ways

From top: Curry Spiced Lentil Salad With Coconut, Lentil Cookies, Sweet 'n' Sour Lentil Stew With Poached Kumquats

In less than two weeks' time, I served uncommonly sweet lentils three ways... four if you want to count the Pineapple Crisp (I don't, given that it was a quick fix for Lentil Cookies gone awry). And the kicker is, I didn't realize I'd done it until this morning as I was reading back over my posts. Great inspiration if you happen to be as short on funds as I am, huh? Who needs three different sources of protein to keep meals interesting?

I pondered the phenomenon and came up with the following advice for repeating a culinary theme several times within a short duration.

1) If two ingredients pair commonly, such as lentils and rice, banish one of them for at least two out of three dishes.

2) Consider that you have a wide range of different courses to work with... appetizer, entree, dessert... One doesn't often put lentils in cookies, but hey, it worked (kinda).

3) Think different times of day. For example, I had my salad for lunch and my stew for dinner.

4) Alter your serving temperatures. The central ingredient should be flexible enough to eat hot, chilled, or at room temp.

5) Attempt different textures in each dish. Lentils are easy to mask, transitioning stealthily from a crunchy salad to a chewy cookie to a smooth stew; but you can even do this with a not-so-subtle ingredient like pork. Serve it grilled one night; braised, shredded, and wrapped in tortillas the next.

Have you ever repeated a culinary theme subconsciously? If so, what kept said theme so fresh?

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Renaissance Cook Challenge

Don't get me wrong, cooking is the spin on my world. But I do have other hobbies. For instance, I unabashedly bookmark style blogs (yes, those folks who take pictures of what they're wearing every day) and am quite the amateur stylist myself. If I had a walk-in closet, I would easily spend as much time there as in the kitchen. Before my husband and I arranged to spend this June through December clad in our unglamorous farming duds, I was even planning to start another blog called The Chickenless Wardrobe.

Now that you know my other hobby, I want to know yours. In the interest of well-roundedness, I hereby present to you my first Renaissance Cook Challenge!

Step #1

Pick a hobby other than cooking.

Step #2

Invent a dish inspired by said hobby. It can be a direct interpretation (example: frosting a cake to look like a soccer ball), or a loose one (example: arranging a dessert tray with all black-and-white foods).

Step #3

Post the results on your blog if you have one, or send pics to dontbeawuss@gmail.com so I can share them here.

The deadline for the Renaissance Cook Challenge will be Tuesday, January 26th. That gives you two weeks to pick a hobby and make your dish.

Have at it! Please feel free to post any questions you may have in the comments.

Addendum: My sharp-minded Foodbuzz buddy Ryan has brought up an excellent question: Are you allowed to re-post about foods you've already cooked? Sorry guys, but this is The Chickenless Kitchen. The point of my challenges is to expand your culinary horizons. So I'm going to have to be a big jerk and say no to that one. However, you may create a different dish inspired by the same hobby. Thanks for the question, Ryan!

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Comfort Food: What Does That Phrase Mean to You?

From top: Pumpkin Pie Ice Cream, Chickpea Stew With Dill, Frittata With Meeeeeeat!, Maple Oatmeal Clafouti

I have been sick the past few days. I mean REALLY sick. Went-to-bed-the-night-of-January-third-wrapped-in-four-extra-blankets-and-convinced-I-was-a-Japanese-pastry-chef sick.

What do you crave when you feel this lousy?

For me, the question has to be answered in stages.

Stage #1: Japanese-pastry-chef sick.

Nothing. I'll ask my body, "Hey body, are you hungry?" and it goes, "Not now, kid. I'm tryin to flush out a virus here!" with the surly Jersey repairman accent and everything.

Stage #2: Improved, but still unable to leave the bed.

Something very small and basic, and usually very specific as well. A handful of cherry tomatoes (not sliced regular tomatoes), a piece of a baguette that's been ripped off (not cut... and forget about giving me any other type of bread), a plain Hershey's Kiss (so help you if I find an almond in there!)

Stage #3: Up and about for half an hour before the sinus headache you got from looking at the computer monitor drives you back under the covers.

Takeout. Usually pho or tacos. Don't ask me why tacos... I think it has something to do with the vinegar in the hot sauce. Vinegar in small doses helps the body retain fluids. But I digress.

Stage #4: Take a shower, wash the sheets, and proceed through the rest of the day with relative normality but for a Dayquil-induced haze.

Stuff that Western society actually considers comfort food: Stew, ice cream, cookies, hot tea, etc.

Does anyone else have stages like this? Or do you crave chicken noodle soup the whole time?

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Did That Man Just Say "Pumpkin" to Me?

On Tuesday, November 3rd, I issued the 30 Rock TV Dinner Challenge. The object was to come up with a dish inspired by the show, cook it by Sunday the 15th, and post your results. Sunday the 15th was yesterday, and here I am sliding in under the wire with my own entry, inspired by a Tracy Jordan line from the (aired) pilot. I looked forever and couldn't find the video clip I wanted to use, or for that matter the full episode. Unfortunately the comic value of this line, like most of his lines, depends on the delivery. While I encourage you to rent the DVD if you're really curious, here is a brief description to set the scene:

Tracy is at a restaurant with Liz and his entourage. The waiter announces that their special is pumpkin ravioli. As he walks away, Liz tries to say something business-related to Tracy. He shushes her and says, "I'm going to ask you a question and I want you all to be completely honest... Did that man just say 'pumpkin' to me?"

See? Funnier when he says it. I was rolling on the floor. Sigh. Strike one.

Here's strike two:

Yes, that is actually supposed to be a pumpkin ravioli. Note to self: Mixing wheat germ and all-purpose flour does not make whole wheat flour. It makes... whatever the hell that is.

So there I was yesterday with a bowl full of ravioli filling and not enough eggs to make more pasta dough. I racked my brain trying to think of something pumpkin-y that would be equally offensive to Tracy Jordan, and finally came up with this savory pumpkin pie.

I wouldn't call it a home run (the recipe could use a little tweaking), but at least I managed to avoid a strike three.

Savory Pumpkin Pie With Chickpeas

Ingredients

Crust*

2 c. flour

2/3 c. butter

1/4 tsp. salt

4-5 Tbsp. cold water

*Though pie crusts are generally similar, I found this one on Cooks Recipes a couple years back.

Filling

1 pie pumpkin weighing about 3 lbs

2 shallots, chopped

2 tsp. dried rosemary

1 tsp. dried marjoram

1/4 tsp. dried thyme

1 Tbsp. olive oil

4 Tbsp. butter

1/2 tsp. salt

2/3 c. Mexican-style crumbling cheese (I imagine feta would result in a similar texture, but the flavor would be completely different)

2 eggs

2 c. cooked chickpeas

Directions

Heat the oven to 450.

Mix the butter, flour, and salt in a large bowl and add 4 Tbsp. of water. Continue mixing. If the dough sticks together in a big ball, there's no need to add the last Tbsp. of water; if it still seems dry, add water slowly until the mixture reaches a dough-y consistency. Separate into two dough balls of equal size. Wrap each in plastic and store in the refrigerator.

Cut out the pumpkin's stem, grasp it firmly, and scream, "blargh!" as if you are holding a human heart.

Quarter the pumpkin... I know, I know. But look, my husband and I did it even without the proper type of knife. Instead we used two improper knives. And a lot of cursing. So you can too. Don't be a wuss.

Scrape out the yummy seeds and leave them out to dry for roasting later. Wrap the quarters in tin foil and roast them at 450 for about 40 minutes. Meanwhile, saute the shallots and herbs in the olive oil over medium heat until the onions are translucent. Add to a large bowl and set aside.

When the pumpkin is finished cooking, remove and turn oven temperature down to 375.

Scrape the pumpkin out of its skin into the bowl. Add the butter and salt. Combine using a large spoon or potato masher. Set aside to cool for about ten minutes, then incorporate the eggs and cheese crumbles.

Stir in the chickpeas.

Butter two 9" pie tins.

Roll each dough ball out flat on a well-floured surface to a diameter of 12".

To transport, fold each crust into quarters. Place these in pie tins with the points of the quartered crusts at the center. Unfold the crusts and press firmly into the tins. If needed, trim the edges using clean kitchen shears. Flute or crimp as desired.

Distribute the filling evenly between the two crusts.

Bake at 375 for 35-40 minutes, or until barely browned on top.

Cool about ten minutes before slicing. Each pie serves 6 as an entree or 8-10 as an appetizer. To reheat, simply bake at 350 for ten minutes.

Thank you to all who participated in my first TV Dinner Challenge. There will be more to come. As always, I welcome your ideas for shows to use; as well as your ideas for new challenges in general. Please feel free to leave your suggestion as a comment or email dontbeawuss@gmail.com.

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TV Dinner: 30 Rock

The Show: 30 Rock

The Challenge: Cook something inspired by the show on or before Sunday, November 15th (this gives you two full weekends to think it over). It can be based on a specific moment, or on a broad concept or character. If you have a food blog, post your results. If not, I'd still love to see your creation, so feel free to email pics and stories to dontbeawuss@gmail.com.

If you're not a 30 Rock fan, don't fret- there will be more TV Dinners to come! Let me know if you have any ideas for future challenges.

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Aw Yeah, Here Are the Results of the Wheat Germ Challenge...

I'm ready!! I'm ready!!

...Wait, I'm not ready.

Can anyone tell me what this is?

Well, then, damn it, I'm not ready.

Why hasn't anyone made the application for Google yet where you can just upload a picture of something and then ask what it is? That would be useful right now. Because I got this is in my Vietnamese takeout container a couple days ago, and now it is an integral part of my wheat germ challenge recipe.

Anyhoo, other than the fact that I used a mystery herb (hoping some of my Foodbuzz friends will be able to lend a hand here??), this went swimmingly. I hope to make Baffling Ingredient a common recurrence, if not a rigid feature, on the Chickenless Kitchen. Face it, people, I do have to work sometimes... sometimes. Once in a blue moon.

Without further ado, I made Back to School Granola Bars by Sunshine Mom:

I made them to the very best of my ability.

I made them without letting my ADD take over.

Except for the part where I excluded the chocolate chips, subbed extra wheat germ for Smart Balance, and crumpled one up to sprinkle over asparagus.

Right. Hopeless.

Granola Asparagus

Ingredients

2 tbsp. olive oil

1 clove garlic, sliced thin

1 lb. asparagus spears

2/3 c. vegetable or other light broth

2 Tbsp natural, unsweetened peanut butter

1 tsp. lime juice

1 Tbsp. mystery herb (I'm pretty sure Thai basil could sub in a pinch)

1 1/2 tsp. soy sauce

1 tsp. rice vinegar

1 of Sunshine Mom's incredible Back to School Granola Bars

Directions

Blanch the asparagus spears. Meanwhile, heat the olive oil over medium-low. Add the garlic slices and swish them around for a few minutes. Just before they start to brown, discard them.

Raise heat to medium-high. Add the asparagus spears to the garlic-infused oil in the pan and saute until cooked through, about seven minutes. Remove the asparagus and plate it, reserving as much oil in the pan as possible. Cover the asparagus to keep it warm.

Turn the heat back down to medium-low. Be patient. I know, it's hard for me too.

Add the remaining ingredients, minus the granola bar, to the pan. Cook, stirring, until the mixture starts to bubble.

Separate the asparagus onto two separate serving plates. Pour the sauce over. Divide the granola bar in half. Crumple each half over a serving. Serves 2.

Thanks very much to Sunshine Mom once again for her delicious recipe! Before you go accusing me of bastardizing it, let me just say in my defense that I bastardized it with a Vitamix.

Have you seen this sucker in action? Here are my peanuts:

Here are my peanuts ten seconds later:

BOO-ya!

You're going to think I work for Vitamix at this point, but I don't. The fact is, I've just never seen anything like it. Thirty more seconds, and I would have had peanut butter.

Is it a new toy, you ask? Oh no, it is not a new toy. I've had it over two years, and I've never had to sharpen the blades. It's just that good. Highly recommend it to anyone who believes in the necessity of owning both a blender and a food processor... this puppy has two different processing bowls, one for dry ingredients (like if you want to make peanut butter out of whole roasted peanuts) and one for wet (like if you want to make smoothies, soup, etc.), and they both work their magic like nothing I've ever seen in a kitchen.

For those of you who didn't see my earlier post, I've been inspired by Michelle Gienow's article about eating responsibly on a food stamp budget. I plan to spend all day tomorrow looking up local sources for protein. Because even being poor, I can't stand buying from irresponsible sources for one more week. I have to do the best I can; despite being here in Orlando, which in my opinion is a desert for responsibly-raised food products. Don't get me wrong- I love being here, and if I didn't, I would leave in a heartbeat. I just want to do some research and see if it's possible to have my cake and eat it too.

Will have some results for you tomorrow night. Til then, thanks to all who participated in the wheat germ project, and hope to see your entry in the next Baffling Ingredient challenge!

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Baffling Ingredient: Wheat Germ

Now, before you go making a million comments like, "Put it in yogurt" or "Sprinkle it on your cereal..." Well, that's about it. Otherwise, I invite you to go nuts. Because I may toot my own horn about being some uber-creative kitchen diva, but I am really stumped when it comes to wheat germ.

Not to be outdone by an inanimate jar of food product (no matter how excellent a source of Vitamin E and Folic acid it may be), I will post at least one recipe containing wheat germ by Tuesday of next week... and it may be yours! Please feel free to email me or leave a link in the comments. If I end up using your recipe, I will of course credit you and provide a link to your site if you have one. I'm sure all fourteen of my followers will happily pay you a visit ;)

On the subject of having fourteen followers, if no one has a suggestion, I will come up with a Chickenless Chick Original Recipe. But I can't be held responsible if it turns your complexion green to read it. If it's gross, well then, you should have helped me out!

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What Do You Want on Your Pizza?

Even those of us with the best of intentions ("From now on, I will eat nothing but nutritious meals that I make myself with local, organic ingredients!") sometimes find ourselves in the position where a husband invites a buddy over to help him replace the radiator, and take-out pizza with beer seems the only acceptable compensation. More than a couple toppings can be expensive, though, so as you can see I jazzed my slice up with some arugula from my own fridge. Greens don't keep well for more than a week, so may as well use them while the using is good.

Do you ever put your own toppings on take-out pizza? Is this a sensible way to pinch pennies, or would you bother? And if you do it for culinary rather than monetary reasons, what is your favorite topping that run-of-the-mill pizza joints never seem to have?

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Celebrity Chef Survey

At the suggestion of Ardeth Blood, I invite you to take the Chickenless Kitchen's Celebrity Chef Survey. Tell me who you are and why. For instance, I'm Alice Waters- I have good intentions, but am so far out of the media loop that I sometimes commit major faux pas (see the recent shark fin soup fiasco).

Have at it. Don't be afraid to bring on the funny.

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Crutch Potluck

Quiche is a crutch food for me. Somewhere along the line I learned that I could make it for any occasion; formal or casual, sit-down or buffet. And then eat it again for breakfast the next morning. And again for lunch. Here are the baby quiches that I made to eat with soup for dinner last night. Isn't that the most ridiculously wussy thing you've ever heard? The laziness must stop here.

I propose a crutch potluck. If you think of an easy, versatile food that you make entirely too often, share it in the comments. This will encourage us to try other peoples' crutches, thereby relying less on our own crutches, thereby eliminating them as crutches, thereby being less wussy. Hooray!

P.S. Oh yeah, the recipe... You know how to make quiche, right? Just use a muffin tin instead. And don't cook it quite as long.

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