Aw Yeah, Here Are the Results of the Wheat Germ Challenge...

I'm ready!! I'm ready!!

...Wait, I'm not ready.

Can anyone tell me what this is?

Well, then, damn it, I'm not ready.

Why hasn't anyone made the application for Google yet where you can just upload a picture of something and then ask what it is? That would be useful right now. Because I got this is in my Vietnamese takeout container a couple days ago, and now it is an integral part of my wheat germ challenge recipe.

Anyhoo, other than the fact that I used a mystery herb (hoping some of my Foodbuzz friends will be able to lend a hand here??), this went swimmingly. I hope to make Baffling Ingredient a common recurrence, if not a rigid feature, on the Chickenless Kitchen. Face it, people, I do have to work sometimes... sometimes. Once in a blue moon.

Without further ado, I made Back to School Granola Bars by Sunshine Mom:

I made them to the very best of my ability.

I made them without letting my ADD take over.

Except for the part where I excluded the chocolate chips, subbed extra wheat germ for Smart Balance, and crumpled one up to sprinkle over asparagus.

Right. Hopeless.

Granola Asparagus

Ingredients

2 tbsp. olive oil

1 clove garlic, sliced thin

1 lb. asparagus spears

2/3 c. vegetable or other light broth

2 Tbsp natural, unsweetened peanut butter

1 tsp. lime juice

1 Tbsp. mystery herb (I'm pretty sure Thai basil could sub in a pinch)

1 1/2 tsp. soy sauce

1 tsp. rice vinegar

1 of Sunshine Mom's incredible Back to School Granola Bars

Directions

Blanch the asparagus spears. Meanwhile, heat the olive oil over medium-low. Add the garlic slices and swish them around for a few minutes. Just before they start to brown, discard them.

Raise heat to medium-high. Add the asparagus spears to the garlic-infused oil in the pan and saute until cooked through, about seven minutes. Remove the asparagus and plate it, reserving as much oil in the pan as possible. Cover the asparagus to keep it warm.

Turn the heat back down to medium-low. Be patient. I know, it's hard for me too.

Add the remaining ingredients, minus the granola bar, to the pan. Cook, stirring, until the mixture starts to bubble.

Separate the asparagus onto two separate serving plates. Pour the sauce over. Divide the granola bar in half. Crumple each half over a serving. Serves 2.

Thanks very much to Sunshine Mom once again for her delicious recipe! Before you go accusing me of bastardizing it, let me just say in my defense that I bastardized it with a Vitamix.

Have you seen this sucker in action? Here are my peanuts:

Here are my peanuts ten seconds later:

BOO-ya!

You're going to think I work for Vitamix at this point, but I don't. The fact is, I've just never seen anything like it. Thirty more seconds, and I would have had peanut butter.

Is it a new toy, you ask? Oh no, it is not a new toy. I've had it over two years, and I've never had to sharpen the blades. It's just that good. Highly recommend it to anyone who believes in the necessity of owning both a blender and a food processor... this puppy has two different processing bowls, one for dry ingredients (like if you want to make peanut butter out of whole roasted peanuts) and one for wet (like if you want to make smoothies, soup, etc.), and they both work their magic like nothing I've ever seen in a kitchen.

For those of you who didn't see my earlier post, I've been inspired by Michelle Gienow's article about eating responsibly on a food stamp budget. I plan to spend all day tomorrow looking up local sources for protein. Because even being poor, I can't stand buying from irresponsible sources for one more week. I have to do the best I can; despite being here in Orlando, which in my opinion is a desert for responsibly-raised food products. Don't get me wrong- I love being here, and if I didn't, I would leave in a heartbeat. I just want to do some research and see if it's possible to have my cake and eat it too.

Will have some results for you tomorrow night. Til then, thanks to all who participated in the wheat germ project, and hope to see your entry in the next Baffling Ingredient challenge!

Beat the eggs. Whip the cream. Show no mercy.

Kicking Off a Compulsory Vegetarian Week: Lentil and Broccoli Rabe Salad with Honey-Orange Vinaigrette

All right, so it's not compulsory in the literal sense. No one is holding a gun to my head making me go vegetarian this week. But my husband and I agree that if we can't afford that "fancy" free-range, grain-fed meat, we don't want meat at all. It disturbs us to think of the cruelty that goes on in those factory situations.

In any case, there are plenty of fantastic dishes out there centered on eggs (yes, I still bought cage-free eggs... I'm hopeless! We're going to be kicked out and living under the 408 overpass in no time), cheese, beans, and/or legumes. Publix had one lonely bundle of broccoli rabe that needed a home, and since I'd never tried broccoli rabe, I snapped it up, thinking it would go great in a lentil salad I had planned.

Hooray! Success!

For those of you who have never tried it, broccoli rabe is like regular broccoli with a kick. Raw, it tastes bitter. But lightly steamed and then chilled in a sweet garlicky marinade, it adds a mild spice and enhanced green flavor that both my husband and I loved. Liz and Mary at Green Flamingo Organics are growing some as we speak, which is another reason I was curious to try it. Can't wait to get it from them and other local sources later this fall.

Lentil and Broccoli Rabe Salad with Honey-Orange Vinaigrette

Ingredients

Lentil and Broccoli Rabe Salad

1 c. steamed lentils

1 c. cooked brown rice (great use for leftover rice)

1 thick slice red onion, finely chopped or minced

2 carrots, finely chopped or minced

3 c. broccoli rabe, chopped

Honey-Orange Vinaigrette

1/3 c. olive oil

1 1/2 Tbsp. Balsamic vinegar

1 Tbsp. orange juice

2 tsp. holly honey

1 tsp. lemon juice

1 large or 2 small cloves garlic, crushed

1/2 tsp. salt

1/4 tsp. pepper

Directions

Steam the broccoli rabe until just tender (about three minutes in the microwave). Drain, allow to cool, then combine with the rest of the salad ingredients.

In a cup or bowl, add the salt to the vinegar and whisk until well-dissolved. Add the rest of the vinaigrette ingredients and whisk together.

Pour the vinaigrette over the salad ingredients and combine. Cover and refrigerate at least 4 hours to suck the bitterness out of the broccoli rabe and let the garlic do its thang. Serves 4 as a light main dish; not recommended as a an appetizer due to its strong palette-numbing flavor, but use your discretion.

This would also have been super-good with feta cheese and dried cranberries. As far as serving suggestions, my two cents' worth of advice is to pair it with something simple. My husband and I preceded it with hot chicken broth and fresh bread for a well-rounded, seasonally-appropriate meal.

As usual, if you try any variations at home, let me know how it turns out!

Beat the eggs. Whip the cream. Show no mercy.

Arugula Salad With Black-Eyed Peas, Honey Crisp Apples, and Zesty Tomato Dressing

Since I did not make it to the farmers' market over the weekend, I indulged in some non-local goodies at Publix, including the honey crisp apples in this salad. It seems unfair for nature to deny me an iconic food like the apple. But I don't have to scrape ice off my windshield or shovel snow out of my driveway, so let's call it even.

Zesty Tomato Dressing

Ingredients

2 Tbsp. olive oil

1 Tbsp. tomato puree

1 tsp. dijon mustard

1/2 tsp. holly honey

Salt, pepper, and hot sauce to taste

Directions

Combine ingredients and whisk together. Serves 2.

Beat the eggs. Whip the cream. Show no mercy.

Farm-Fresh Malabar Spinach With Broccoli and Red Onions in Garlic Cream Sauce

I was disappointed to learn that, even lightly steamed and served in an "Ow! Sweet merciful Dionysus, my arteries!" sauce, Malabar spinach has the same texture as sinus-infection lougies. Major bummer, being that the rest of this side dish was THE BOMB. Next time I'll steam the hell out of it, despite my compulsive wariness of overcooking.

Farm-Fresh Malabar Spinach With Broccoli and Red Onions in Garlic Cream Sauce

Ingredients:

2 c. broccoli florets

½ red onion, sliced thin or diced large

Approx. 2 c. well-packed Malabar spinach (why, oh, why don’t I have a kitchen scale yet? And don’t give me any of that “because your grocery bill is too high as it is” nonsense!)

3 Tbsp. chicken drippings or clarified butter

3-4 cloves garlic, chopped

2 Tbsp. flour

½ c. milk

½ c. heavy cream

Salt-n-pepper

Directions

Steam the veggies separately, then combine (the onion can be steamed with the broccoli if desired, but the spinach will take a much shorter time).

Meanwhile, heat the drippings or butter in a small saucepan over medium-low heat. Add the garlic and sauté until soft. Whisk in the flour. Continue whisking until you’ve made a roux the color of brown sugar. Add the milk and cream. Continue whisking until the sauce thickens. Remove from heat.

While they’re still hot, salt and pepper the veggies to taste. Add the sauce to the veggies slowly, stirring as you go (you will probably have leftover sauce.) Serves 4 as a side dish.

Any extra sauce will keep for a few days in the fridge; and in fact, like many garlicky sauces, it’s better as a leftover. It’s good with chicken, root veggies, pasta, rice… the list goes on. Stir well before serving.

Beat the eggs. Whip the cream. Show no mercy.